Game of Thrones

Tyrion Lannister’s 10 Greatest Quotes


There is no character on Game of Thrones more loveable than Tyrion Lannister. There are a number of intelligent characters on the show, but Tyrion also possesses cunning wit and a devilish sense of humor. His neglectful and horrid family also make him a character that you have great sympathy for, plus his lust for wine and women ensure that he is more than capable of providing comedic relief as well as driving the plot forwards. It is for these reasons, as well as Peter Dinklage’s fantastic portrayal, that he is a fan favorite with many of the best lines.

10. “Killed a few puppies today?”

One of the great scenes from the show occurs in the Season Three finale, where a Small Council meeting in King’s Landing sees an overexcited Joffrey schooled and sent to bed by his grandfather, Tywin. As Tyrion arrives at this meeting (following a touching scene with Sansa), he finds Joffrey full of glee which sees Tyrion hilariously ask his nephew “killed any puppies today?” We would not have put it past Joffrey, but his glee instead comes from the news that Robb and Catelyn Stark are dead. When Joffrey reveals this, Tyrion is in shock and he then threatens Joffrey after he claims that he will gift Robb’s head to Sansa. After Tywin orders Joffrey to bed despite his protests that he is not tired, Tyrion quips “you just sent the most powerful man in Westeros to bed without his supper.”

9. “It’s hard to put a leash on a dog once you’ve put a crown on its head.”

Joffrey was horrible to just about everyone, but particularly to his uncle Tyrion, whom he humiliated on a number of occasions. There were many fantastic scenes between these two characters, as Tyrion clearly understood just how awful his nephew was and was one of the only character who challenged him. In Season Two, Cersei and Tyrion are discussing Joffrey and how he cannot be controlled, which is when Tyrion delivers this excellent line about his nephew. Cersei then makes Tyrion and the audience incredibly uncomfortable when she begins wondering if Joffrey’s violent personality is a price of the “sins” that her and her brother Jaime have committed. It is a rare scene where Tyrion and Cersei see eye to eye and do not sling thinly veiled insults at one another.

8. “Everything’s better with some wine in the belly.”

In the short amount of time they spent together, Jon Snow certainly learned a lot from Tyrion (more on this to come). As they travel to The Wall, where Jon will take The Black whilst Tyrion wants to “stand on the edge and p*ss off the end of the world,” Jon discovers that the Night’s Watch is not quite what he thought. Instead it’s a dumping ground for criminals and the unwanted. Tyrion states that “everything’s better with some wine in the belly,” before tossing Jon some wine which he takes a big sip of. It is a great motto for Tyrion, who never turns down a glass. He will drink in both the happy and sad times. Much like many of his great quotes, this is printed over all kinds of Game of Thrones merchandise. It is this philosophy that makes Tyrion a fan favorite. Via Pinterest

7. “I have a tender spot in my heart for cripples, bastards, and broken things.”

As somebody who has been mistreated by his family and called awful things for being a dwarf, Tyrion has built a shield of emotional armor around him, but also remains incredibly sympathetic — a quality that makes him so likable. It’s evident very early on that he has a soft spot for those that are disadvantaged, which largely comes from his interactions with Jon Snow and this moment where he makes a kind gesture to Bran Stark, despite the frosty relationship between the Lannister’s and Starks. Returning to Winterfell on his way to Kings Landing, Tyrion gifts Bran blueprints for a saddle which would enable him to ride despite his paraplegia. Questioned why by a skeptical Robb Stark, Tyrion explains that he has a tender spot in his heart for “cripples, bastards and broken things” – also the title of the episode.

6. “A mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone.”

Tyrion understands the power of knowledge and is certainly one of the most intelligent characters on the show. In fact, he’s well aware that this is his greatest weapon. It is due to this intelligence that he has managed to survive and found himself as the Hand of the Queen at one point. Of course, the same intelligence has gotten him into a bit of trouble from time to time too. In a conversation with Jon Snow, Tyrion explains that things are expected of him as a Lannister – “my brother has his sword and I have my mind, and a mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone, if it is to keep its edge. That’s why I read so much, Jon Snow.” Up there with “the pen is mightier than the sword,” this is a quote that book readers love. Via

5. “It’s not easy being drunk all the time. Everyone would do it if it were easy.”

It is rare to see Tyrion without a glass of wine in his hand, but apparently it is not as fun as it looks. Following the Red Wedding and the fallout, there was desperate need for some comedic relief as things were getting very heavy on the show. In these moments, there is nobody better to turn to than Tyrion. While rapidly drinking wine with Podrick, who is struggling to keep up, Tyrion explains that “it’s not easy being drunk all the time. Everyone would do it if it were easy.” It may not be easy, but we appreciate the effort, as many of Tyrion’s greatest moments have come from his drunken ramblings and his attempts to get others to join in the fun. Via Giphy

4. “Death is so final, whereas life, ah, life is full of possibilities.”

Despite his horrible family and being mistreated by many, Tyrion certainly enjoys life. He has a passion for many things (most notably wine and women), which he perfectly captures with this powerful quote from Season One. In the scene, the Lannisters are having breakfast in Winterfell and discussing the fact that Bran Stark is still alive. With Jaime and Cersei sweating slightly, knowing that they are in big trouble if he wakes and remembers being shoved out the window, Jaime states that if he lives he will be “a cripple, grotesque” and that he would rather a clean death. Tyrion replies “speaking for the grotesques, I’ll have to disagree. Death is so final, whereas life, ah, life is full of possibilities.” Although Tyrion has done well to escape death so far, unlike many other major Game of Thrones characters, things have not exactly gone to plan for him. At least he appears to have now found his place next to Daenerys. Via Twitter

3. “That’s what I do. I drink and I know things.”

Tyrion really hit the nail on the head here, as this perfectly sums up his character. Delivered in Season Six, this is his response when his knowledge about dragons is questioned by Missandei and Grey Worm (fittingly, he has a glass of wine in his hand as he delivers the line). Tyrion spent a large chunk of Season Six attempting to impress and win over both Missandei and Grey Worm, who were skeptical of his loyalty to Daenerys and also very different to him (this was one of the main sources of humor in this season). They did not appear to get his humor, but he did manage to break through when he encouraged them to join him in a drink and to share jokes. He appears to have got them onside now, and along with Daenerys, her army, the Greyjoys, Tyrells, Martells and oh yeah, three very large dragons, he will soon be making a dramatic return to Westeros. Via SBNation

2. “Never forget what you are, the rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor and it can never be used to hurt you.”

It seems like an eternity ago that a clean shaven Tyrion arrived in Winterfell and met Jon Snow for the first time. There were a few brilliant exchanges, but the greatest and most important is where Tyrion offers this excellent advice to the always sulking Jon Snow. With Jon not invited to the feast, Tyrion approaches his fellow outcast, who becomes even sulkier when Tyrion calls him a “bastard.” The advice appears to be something that Jon took to heart, as he does not appear to get as offended by the same word after this conversation. This was most noticeable in Season Six and the Battle of the Bastards, where Ramsey constantly calls Jon a bastard but does not get a reaction out of him in the slightest. Tyrion is called awful things such as “The Imp”, “Halfman” and even “monster,” but he rarely appears to be hurt by these words and instead he wears it like armor.

1. “I am the God of t*ts and wine.”

Wine and women are Tyrion’s two favorite things, and so much so that he has decreed himself as the “God of t*ts and wine.” He delivers this fantastic quote at his very awkward wedding to Sansa, which he makes more manageable by drinking heavily (only making it more uncomfortable for poor Sansa). When his father comes over to chastise him for being so drunk and stating that he needs to get Sansa pregnant, Tyrion recalls that his father once called him “a drunken little lust-filled beast.” Tyrion then claims “drinking and lust. No man can match me in these things. I am the god of t*ts and wine…I shall build a shrine to myself at the next brothel I visit.” This has become such a popular quote, that you can now get all kinds of merchandise with it printed all over.

Jonny Hughes

Jonny Hughes

Jonny Hughes has been writing about movies and TV for Goliath since 2015.